“The Big Bang Theory” by Greg Fox
LAWYER: I’m sorry Mr. Cooper- not only is there very little evidence to suggest that you composed Brian Eno’s Another Green World, but there’s also copious evidence that the writing, recording, and release of the album all predate your birth by several years.
SHELDON: But dammit, man, do I have a case?
LAWYER: I’m sorry. I’ll have to ask you leave, right after I fire whoever let you in.
BRIAN ENO casually pops his head into the room.
ENO: Dave, did you look over the contract from Columbia?
ENO’S eyes suddenly catch SHELDON’S, and they go wide with guilt and fear.
ENO: Oh, balls!
ENO runs out of the building. CLOSE UP of SHELDON.
SHELDON (Voice over): And with that, my hypothesis was realized. When that patent attorney fell into my particle accelerator, it had given me limited power over space time: I was now able to alter the past, but only through lawsuits. After that, it was up to the courts.
CUT to their APARTMENT. SHELDON is talking to LEONARD.
SHELDON: I ended up losing the Eno case, despite his unconvincing testimony. I still feel I had a moral victory. The legal expenses bled me dry, though, which is why I need you to spot me for dinner again.
